If only tears could bring you back
by inquisitive me
Summary: Achilles, I never told you that...I love you." - Briseis reflects on her brief meetings with him and what he told her. (One-shot) [AchillesBriseis]


Hey everyone, this is my second one-shot troy fanfic. I hope you like it. On wednesday the troy dvd came out in aus :) I had to rush out and buy it and after watching it over and over again especially the achilles briseis bits I decided to write a fanfic. I hope u like it

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**If Only Tears Could Bring You Back...**  
  
_Briseis's Point of View_

The Gods. Apollo, Posiedon, Zeus, Hera, Athena and many more.

They're all to be feared and respected at the same.

Sometimes I wonder how they work. Why they do certain things. Why they lead us on the paths they do. Why they do the things, they do.

Do not misunderstand me; I have not lost faith or respect in the gods even though I am no longer a priestess, I just sometimes wonder.

Sometimes I wonder, do the Gods laugh at us. We humans must be amusing to them...even if maybe they are envious of us. We must seem so humorous; the way we take life for granted. Any moment may be our last but we are so caught up in the instant that we don't bother to savor or remember the special times that life has to offer. And once you realize it...it's gone, sometimes forever. One moment, everything is perfect and the next, it's not. No, that's not true, it is worse than not perfect, it is horrible!

They must laugh. They must laugh at the stupidity of humans. They must sometimes purposely create chaos just to laugh at us.

I know I should not speak bitterly about the gods but I am still hurting from the deep invisible wounds the gods have cut.

This is the truth to be told.

I've spent most of my life dedicating my life to the gods. Ever since I was young, I cherished, I worshiped, I loved the Gods. I loved it when Uncle Priam would tell me great stories of the might Apollo and when I became a priestess I was delighted. I thought it was the right place for me. I loved the Gods, I still do but...I've always been a pacifist and I just could not understand the thousands of soldiers who died. For what? For Glory? _He _taught me though. _He _made me understand his way of thinking, though I was reluctant at first. And also without _him_ I would never have question the gods. _He _taught me something about the gods that no priest has ever taught before. _He _also taught me many other things...

_He_ came into my life or rather I was forced into his, exactly two months ago... two months ago to this date. And the first meeting will never fade my memory. It was quite amusing and I'm sure the Gods were up there laughing at me. I had heard myths and stories about him, all as frightening and gruesome as the next but he was not like that, as I discovered afterwards. You should never judge someone before you meet them, and now I never do, because I would have missed out on a lot ... if it weren't for the Gods. For that I am grateful to them but for the outcome I am still angry. 

Tied up in his tent, hurt and angry I would have never expected the man that came through those leather straps. He was arrogant and conceited but he still intrigued and fascinated me. I was entranced by those penetrating deep blue eyes and the golden matted locks, in our first conversation but I hid it well.

And when he saved me, I melted in his strong arms and I felt genuinely safe and protected in them, something I did not even feel entirely when hugged by Hector, my dear cousin. I was distrustful towards his advances as I was confused by the new emotion coursing through me and instead tried to provoke him. But he succeeded into provoking me and I didn't feel angry but instead admiration. No man had ever questioned me before.

That night, logic and sense returned to me and I had tried to do the unthinkable – murder, even if it was killing one who would murder many more. But my attempt had failed. I should have known it would because once I looked into those blue eyes I was mesmerized. _He _surprised me and I surprised myself when I allowed his advances. I remember _him _rolling me over and kissing me passionately. It felt wonderful. His hands had roamed my body leaving a burning trail...and when he showed me how much he loved me...I had felt such a bliss...such a happiness I had never felt before.

I loved him. I loved him with all my heart. It was true love; fiery and passionate but gentle and caring at the same time. It was love that I had thought I would never feel but I had. It was perfect. When he held me in his arms at night and our bodies melted together into one I felt safe, protected like nothing could ever take us apart. How the Gods must be laughing then. Apollo must have been angry about my betrayal but I didn't care then. All I cared was that I was with him. He would whisper in my ears at night...about leaving the war...for me...that we would start a family... The way he looked at me made me feel wanted; made me tremble; made me feel truly loved.

Nothing in the world mattered more to me. Nothing. But I should have known... it was never going to last. The Gods had their little scheme all already planned and I was going to just be one of their many puppets for amusement.

Because when the Greeks had somehow broken into the great walls of Troy...I didn't know it then but it was the final battle... the battle where the Greeks conquered the Trojans...the battle which signaled the end... our end. 

I remember that night perfectly. It has been in my thoughts day and night that I can almost feel I could relive it; relive the anguish and despair.

Troy was alight with burning flames. Sometimes I can hear echoes of the tortured screams and yells where innocent men, women and children were being slaughtered. I had fled to the statue of Apollo, praying for forgiveness. I felt responsible; I had betrayed Apollo and I just knew that this was punishment. Cold, slimy hands had grabbed my hair and the smirking face of Agmanneon had come into view. Hatred and loathing had surged through me and gave me the strength to kill him. I thought my end had come then but I was wrong because as always _he _surprised me. That instance when he gathered me up I thought everything would be okay. But I was a fool. Nothing is okay, nothing will ever be okay now. I saw Paris and the gleam of loathing and vengeance in his eyes. The next few moment were like a blur of mixed colours and noises. I saw an arrow slicing through his heel and the pained look on his face as he arched pack in agony. More arrows were shot and I remember screaming, begging, doing anything to keep him alive.

I still remember the intense pain coursing through my body; physically and mentally. I had ran to him, the tears pouring down my face for I knew that his time had come.

"It's all right." He had said quietly, wiping away me tears. "It's all right." But I knew it wasn't. He was going to...die...The man I loved was going to die.

"You gave me peace in a lifetime of war." It brought on another waterfall of tears to hear those beautiful words for him. From the stories I had heard, _he _was a cold cruel man with no heart but I had seen his heart. He had shown to him and now I was going to lose him. He kissed me. It was a passionate and fiery kiss like the first one we had ever shared. _  
_

"Briseis come." Paris's voice broke the kiss.

For a brief second, I hated Paris. It was his fault. It was his fault that he was dying. But that moment passed quickly when I realized it was the Gods. They had already planned who was going to win; who was going to lose; who was going to live; who was going to die.

"Go." he commanded. Even in his dying moment he was still proud. I know the stories will describe him as flawless but he had many faults; pride being the dominant one. But I felt lucky that I knew him, the way he was, not some legend or myth. I knew the real him. "You must." He said a tone of urgency in his voice. I wouldn't leave him. He was all I wanted.

"Troy is fallen. Go."

I clung to him, hoping that he would be all right.

"We must go. I know a way out." Cut in Paris's unwanted voice again.

"It's all right." He said calmly. "Go."

I kissed him. I kissed him like their was no tomorrow...for in truth their would be not tomorrow for me without him. It was a magical kiss and in the moment out lips met we were inseparable. I knew it would be the last one we shared.

"Go."

Maybe it was the fact that he seemed so peaceful or maybe I knew I had to but I went with Paris. It took all the strength but I left him; my heart shattering as I did. I took one last look at the greatest warrior that ever lived and the only man I would ever love and left.

His face still haunts the deepest pit in my soul. And I as walk endlessly further and further away from Troy; tears can't help but stream uncontrolled. And it pains me to put my hand over my swelling stomach because he doesn't even know that I am bearing his child. He will never know that he has a child; he will never see the child grow; he won't even know if it's a boy or a girl...

The Gods I though bitterly again. Another cruel joke on me. But I knew deep down inside, it wasn't the Gods fault I didn't say it. It wasn't the Gods fault I didn't savour the moment. It wasn't the Gods fault I regretted never saying it.

If only my tears could bring you back, I would tell you those three words I always regretted not saying. Never daring to say them. Those three words I held back because I was scare; scared that I felt this way and scared that you wouldn't feel the same. Those three words that hold so much power...  
  
"Achilles. I never told you that I love you."

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So do you like it? Reveiew please! Oh and check out my other troy fanfic My Dying Day! It's good I promise.


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